Prep Your Home For A Successful Spring Sale

Spring Into Action

The holiday season is officially over, and while spring hasn’t sprung just yet, the days are getting longer, and your New Year’s resolutions are in full swing. You’re hitting the gym, going to yoga, eating better, and generally feeling like 2020 is going to be your best year ever. If you’re planning to sell your home this spring, it’s a great idea to channel some of that “New Year, New You” optimism into the home sale process. Consider these your go-to goals for prepping your home for a successful spring sale in 2020:

Declutter And Then Declutter Some More.

Selling your home can be a great time to let go of that which no longer serves you, so take a cue from Netflix declutter phenom Marie Kondo and start letting go of all of the items that no longer spark joy for you. (Yes, all of them.) Set aside time to go through every cabinet, drawer, closet, shed, and crawl space, and ask yourself which items you really want to hold onto and why. If you didn’t remember that you had it, have never worn or used it, or if it’s a duplicate of something, get rid of it. Ideally everyone in the household should take inventory of their own belongings and declutter accordingly.

What you choose to keep should serve a purpose and/or have so much emotional significance to you that you can’t possibly part with it. Donate, trash, or recycle everything else. Like it or not, potential home buyers are definitely going to open your cabinets and closets, and if it looks like you don’t have enough room for your stuff, they certainly won’t want to try to squeeze in their own stuff. That means ditching the ancient spices and expired vitamins in the kitchen cabinets, the shoes you only wore that one time, the mountain of grocery store bags, and the skinny jeans you’ve been hoping to get back into for the last decade. You want potential buyers to see that there is plenty of room for all of their belongings- from clothing, shoes, and books, to snacks, spices, dishes, and flatware.  

Make Space

Consider putting large furniture items into a storage unit if your plan is to take them with you to your next house. While your living room spanning sectional may have been a necessary squeeze for your family of five, potential buyers will only see lack of space. Exercise equipment and any other extraneous pieces of furniture that don’t really fit should also be cleared and put into storage. Continuing to use the guest bedroom or office as a storage space and graveyard for moving boxes packaging is a definite no. You might also want pack up small appliances, both to clear space and to avoid confusion about whether or not, for example, the microwave comes with the home.

Spring Clean

Whether you hosted guests, holiday parties, or just weathered those November/December rain storms, your home is undoubtedly due for a good old fashioned deep clean. Now is not the time to skimp on quality. Hire a professional. Have them tackle cobwebs, pet dander, baseboards, blinds, ceiling fans, and light fixtures. Have the windows cleaned inside and out, and make the floors, tiles, and countertops shine. Nothing is more inviting to a potential home buyer than a clean slate.  

Get Your Curb Appeal On

Winter rain storms and Santa Ana winds can leave your yard looking as if a mini cyclone hit. Broken branches, fallen leaves, and trees encroaching upon windows and over fences need to be trimmed and cleared. You don’t want the buyer to think about how much work the landscaping will be, you only want them to see how beautiful the finished the product is. Just like in interpersonal communications, first impressions are everything. When you’re selling a home, that means you’ve got to bring the curb appeal. A power wash, or a fresh coat of paint is the Brooks Brothers suit of home selling. Definitely add potted flowers around the outdoor entrance, and hey, if you see a red door and you want to paint it black, that might actually be a great idea! Okay, maybe not red to black, but consider painting your front door for a pop of color and instant, memorable, curb appeal. The house with the blue door has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?    

De-personalize

While your wedding photos are undoubtedly beautiful, and your kids and animals are adorable, potential home buyers need to be able to envision the home as theirs, which means removing the evidence that it is yours. Replace family photos with artwork. Even books should be kept to a minimum and should be neatly and artfully arranged. Toys should be boxed up and set aside whenever possible, or at the very least organized into nifty storage cubes or baskets. Pinterest is a great place for ideas on home décor and storage solutions, but if this all sounds too overwhelming, consider hiring a professional to stage your home.

 Do The Repairs

Potential buyers are going to want to know that their new home is in tip-top shape. While we like to think that San Diego has two seasons, warm and warmer, in recent years we’ve been reminded that we also get quite a bit of rain. Make sure that gutters and downspouts are free from blockages and in working order, and definitely inspect the roof and repair any leaks. All the rain we just had may also mean that you’ve got areas in your yard that are prone to flooding, which is bad news for the foundation of your house. Low areas should be filled with compacted soil. Have the fireplace swept, and service and inspect the HVAC system, plumbing, electrical, foundation, walls, etc. You’ll be prepared for the inspection when the buyer does one, and there will be less wiggle room on your asking price because of it.  

Neutralize

Neutral colors are your new best friends. While you may have been pleased as punch with blue bedrooms and lemon-yellow kitchens, potential buyers can’t seem to see past a paint color that they don’t like. Don’t believe me? Watch an episode of any HGTV show that walks potential buyers a through a home for a sale. The number one thing you’ll hear them say is that they do not like the color of walls, at which point the agent reminds them that they can paint the walls the color that they want, because well, that’s how paint works. Unfortunately, people sometimes have less imagination than we give them credit for, which is why painting your walls in neutral colors before you sell is a must.

Use Good Scents

Odors from your aunt Mary’s famous pasta sauce, tobacco, soccer uniforms, dogs, and litter boxes can kill a sale. Nothing will make a potential home buyer want to turn tail and run (pun intended) like the smell of cat urine or a wet dog or three. That said, don’t make the mistake of trying to cover up the odors with chemical laden scents like Glade Plug-Ins, Febreze, and scented candles. Studies show that one in four people actually find those scents sickening, and truly chemically sensitive people have full blown reactions like nausea and headaches. Instead of trying to cover up odors with more odors, clean, launder, or replace all of the bedding, carpets, and fabrics in your home. Keep your pets freshly groomed and litter boxes immaculate, and of course, open the windows to let in our San Diego fresh air. Right before potential home buyers arrive, set out fragrant fresh flowers with sprigs of eucalyptus, or use all-natural essential oils like lavender or orange in an aromatherapy diffuser.

Let There Be Light

Once you’ve had your windows cleaned inside and out, it’s time to remove faded window coverings, replace or clean the blinds, and open them up to let the sunshine in. Natural light is very attractive to home buyers, and will also reflect beautifully on the floors and countertops you just had cleaned or resurfaced.

Honor The Process

Selling a home and preparing for a move can be overwhelming and stressful, but it’s also time for all of the hope and optimism that comes with a new beginning. Purchase a brand-new welcome mat for your front entrance, not only because it will look nicer than the older one that is there now, but because it’s a symbolic gesture. Welcome the new owner to their new home, and set your sights on your own path ahead.   

 *This article was written for print for a ReMax office in San Diego.

How Well Do You Remember These Christmas Movie Classics?

Once upon a Christmas time, in the year nineteen hundred and eighty something, families both traditional and blended would finish stringing tater-tot sized red and green lights onto their Douglas Firs, adjust the rabbit ears on clunky television sets, pop up some Orville Redenbacher on the stovetop, and settle down to watch some of the most cherished and iconic Christmas movies of all time.

Who can forget the first time they watched the bespectacled and cherub faced Ralphie in, A Christmas Story, finally get up the courage to ask his parents for what he really wanted for Christmas? Sure, you might remember that Ralphie asked for a BB gun, but can you remember its exact name? It was, “an official Red Ryder, carbine action, 200-shot, range model air rifle, with a compass in the stock and this thing that tells time.” Of course, poor Ralphie’s Christmas wish was immediately shot down (pun intended) by his well-intentioned parents with the now infamous rebuke, “You’ll shoot your eye out,” but the shenanigans and hilarity didn’t end there. Who couldn’t relate to being the kid so well wrapped in Christmas sweaters, jackets, and mittens, that you couldn’t move your arms and could barely walk? This was before apparel companies like Patagonia perfected neat little Nano Puff down jackets. This, was the olden days. The days when you ate the dinner that was put in front of you, and you could get your mouth washed out with soap for swearing. More than a few of us still pucker our lips in empathetic disdain as we watch Ralphie stand helpless in the bathroom, giant bar of glycerine soap jutting from his mouth. And on the rare occasion that I get a package in the mail marked, “Fragile,” I can’t help but exclaim, “FRAY GEE LAY,” in just the same way that the Old Man Parker does when his fishnet stocking wearing leg lamp finally arrives in a great big box marked, “Fragile.” A Christmas Story is good. So good in fact, that even though we now have hundreds of channels to choose from, TBS and TNT play the movie over and over again- the entire 24 hours of Christmas Day. Christmas never feels complete without at least one (if not two or twelve) viewings of, A Christmas Story.

With so many options of what to watch at Christmas time, it’s not surprising that we’ve made a habit of having weeks long Christmas movie marathons. For many families the movie watching festivities begin on Thanksgiving Day when television networks are fond of playing the 1947 classic, Miracle on 34th Street, which not coincidentally, is set, in part, on Thanksgiving Day. Who among us can’t help but smile when we watch Susan (played by a then 9-year-old Natalie Wood) tug on Santa’s beard to prove that there is no such thing as Santa Claus and that the man claiming to be him is in fact, just a regular old man. The plot thickens when Santa finds himself in court trying to prove that he is, in fact, the real Santa Claus, lest he be committed to a mental institution. And while the state of New York eventually rules in Santa’s favor (thanks to bags of letters addressed to him at the North Pole) that’s not what ultimately changes Susan’s mind. Do you remember what does? If you recall that good old St. Nick seemed to have connections in the Real Estate market, you would be correct. Ultimately, Santa provides Susan’s mother and soon to be new father with directions to Susan’s dream house. And who can’t relate to being a child (or an adult) who wants nothing more than a nice house with their own room, and of course, a swing set in the backyard? We can hear little Natalie Wood’s voice exclaim, “There is a Santa! There is a Santa,” just thinking about it.

Speaking of disputing the existence of Santa, few movies will make you want to bake some Toll House cookies and cozy up with the kids like the 2003 movie, Elf featuring the ever-hilarious Will Ferrell. Ferrell’s character, whose name is Buddy, is an orphan raised to adulthood by Santa and his elves until one fateful day when he is told that he’s not an elf after all, but a human. That’s when Buddy sets out for New York City where he meets his biological father, his new mother, half-brother, and the sweet natured songbird Jovie, played by Zooey Deschanel. Buddy is whimsically child-like, naturally loves Christmas, and has been raised on the standard elf diet of pure sugar, which is why it’s genuinely hilarious when he tries to plan a day with his newfound father by suggesting, “First, we’ll make snow angels for two hours, then we’ll go skating, then we’ll eat a whole roll of Toll House cookie-dough as fast as we can, and then we’ll snuggle.” When Santa has trouble with the engine on his sleigh on Christmas eve, Buddy, Jovie, his new family, and a group of otherwise skeptical New Yorkers save Christmas. Do you remember what makes Santa’s sleigh run when the engine fails? Well, the best way to spread Christmas cheer, is singing loud for all to hear.

While Buddy and Jovie met at their respective jobs as elves for hire at Gimbels department store, another Christmas favorite, The Holiday, is known for a different, “meet cute.” Iris meets Arthur, an elderly, award-winning Hollywood writer, because Arthur gets confused during his morning walk in San Marino and can’t find his way home. That’s when Iris sees Arthur hunched over his walker looking rather befuddled, and offers him a ride. The two become fast friends and he tells her that how they met would have been called a “meet cute” in the kinds of motion pictures that he wrote back in the day. But Iris and Arthur’s isn’t the only “meet cute” in this gem of a Christmas rom-com. There are actually a few. I’ll let you cook up some Christmas fettuccine, cozy up by the fire, and watch the “meet cutes” for yourselves.

If Christmas rom-coms are your thing, then you’ve definitely got, Love Actually on your Christmas movie marathon list. Who can’t help but feel all warm and fuzzy inside as the movie follows an ensemble cast of characters, each with their own unique love story. There is a scene so iconic in this film, it’s on par with the moment Lloyd Dobler holds up a boom box beneath Diane Court’s window in “Say Anything.” I’ll give you a hint, the scene that I’m referring to in “Love Actually,” also involves a boom box. For those readers under forty, boom boxes are large and rectangular battery-operated relics from the 1980’s that played music and made it somewhat portable for the first time ever. Actually, music plays a pretty significant role in, “Love Actually.” Can you remember the name of the song that Sam learns to play drums for in the school Christmas play? You’ll have to watch to find out.  

If you’re a fan of the way, way back classics, then no doubt you watch one of the iterations of A Christmas Carol every season. My family watches several of them, from the Albert Finney and the Alastair Sim versions to Bill Murray’s Scrooged. And every year we ask the same question; “What the heck is in the Christmas Pudding everyone in, ‘A Christmas Carol’ is so crazy about?” According to Wikipedia, Christmas pudding, also known as plum pudding, is composed of thirteen ingredients to symbolize Jesus and the Twelve Apostles, includes many dried fruits held together by egg and beef fat, and is sometimes moistened with a sugary syrup called suet, or molasses. No offense to Great Britain’s centuries old tradition of eating Christmas pudding at Christmas dinner, but I’m gonna stick with brownies. And apple pie. And pumpkin pie. And pecan pie.

 Speaking of pies, Harry Bailey is in charge of bringing pies to the school dance in the movie, It’s a Wonderful Life, and no list of Christmas movies would be complete without having this classic in regular rotation. If you haven’t ever taken the time to watch this masterpiece from start to finish without interruptions, you’re going to want to do so this year. Can you remember how little George Baily loses his hearing in one ear, or what his future wife Mary whispers into it when they are just kids and he’s bent over to get her a scoop of ice cream with some coconut on top? (Incidentally, she tells him that she doesn’t like coconut, and he calls her brainless and gives it to her anyway. Ah, kids in love!) Do you remember what the angel Clarence is reading when he jumps off the bridge to save George?  It was Mark Twain’s Tom Sawyer, and Clarence gifts it to George at the very end of the movie with the inscription, “No man is a failure who has friends,’ while all of George’s friends, neighbors, and his brother, just back from fighting in WWII, sing auld lang syne around the tree. If the ending of  It’s a Wonderful Life doesn’t have you crying tears of Christmas nostalgia into your eggnog, I’m not sure what will.

Of course, there are many other Christmas movie classics that probably tug at your heart strings, make you laugh, or just make Christmas feel like Christmas. White Christmas, National Lampoons Christmas Vacation, The Grinch, Home Alone, and The Polar Express are also on holiday “must watch” lists across America. I know a guy who likes to invite a few friends over every year for some beers to watch Die Hard in his man cave. Hey, whatever floats your Christmas boat. But no matter what’s on your Christmas movie list, just remember the age-old nuggets of wisdom we’ve gleaned from some of the classics. No man is a failure who has friends, every time a bell rings an angel gets its wings, the best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear, God bless us everyone, Love actually is all around, and you’ll shoot your eye out.

 Happy Christmas everyone!

~Sage Jessica Murphy

*This article was written for print for a Real Estate client who wanted a nostalgia themed Christmas movie article that contained some trivia.

What Animals can Teach us About Compassion.



Mark Twain famously said, “The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog.”

While the tone of his comment exemplifies his iconoclastic combination of sarcasm, wit and dark humor, the man makes a good point.

Sometimes people can be really crappy.

And although the Egyptians worshipped cats, Hindus consider the cow sacred, and my generation boasts a pretty large dolphin and unicorn fan club—mythical creatures notwithstanding—by and large our culture seems to have clearly defined the difference between man and beast.

Mankind has declared ourselves masters of the universe—or at the very least, asserted our mastery over all of the beasts in the field. We have made the edict relatively clear:

“Us man. You beast. Sit. Stay. Roll over. Play dead.”

But time and time again, scientists (and anyone with access to YouTube) seem astounded when animals display qualities that humans have historically attributed only to humanity. The qualities that spiritual aspirants so desperately work to cultivate seem to be second nature (pun intended) to animals of all types.

For example, let’s consider compassion. The biggie.

If you want to be of any good in the world at all, and follow in the footsteps of the enlightened ones, the emotions that you must ultimately and undeniably become familiar are empathy and compassion.

While empathy refers to our ability to take the perspective of and feel the emotions of another person, compassion is when those feelings and thoughts include the desire to help. Altruism, in turn, is the kind, selfless behavior often prompted by feelings of compassion. Also known as compassion in action.

If you are on a spiritual or religious path, most teachings emphasize that you must not only cultivate compassion, but that you cultivate it so well that you exude it at all times, even when confronted with horrific or challenging situations.

Tibetan Buddhist monk, Palden Gyastso, spent 33 years imprisoned and tortured by the Chinese, and all the while, he tried not to be angry towards those who inflicted unthinkable harm upon him. Buddhists often use him as an example when we look at the capacity to cultivate compassion.

We could imagine that our enlightened selves would so exude compassion that it might seep out of our pores and shoot through our finger tips like Jesus beams.

With enough compassion, we will at all times seek to alleviate the sorrows of all sentient beings just like our great Bodhisattva of Compassion Avalokitesvara. So enmeshed is the idea of being able to emanate compassion in our religious traditions, that if we were able to do it fully, we would be able to walk on water, heal the sick, raise the dead or leap tall buildings in a single bound (okay maybe not that last part but you get my drift).

Both Christianity and Buddhism would have it that we become so at one with compassion that if we succeed and become saint like or enlightened, our time on earth would be posthumously depicted in images of us crowned with an effervescent halo of white light—possibly with some gold thrown in for good measure and a little bling.

Like St. Francis of Assisi, once we have mastered the art of compassion, the birds of the air will rest on our shoulders, flocks of sheep will gather round, butterflies will alight on our ear lobes, and in our presence, the lion will lie down with the lamb.

Who knows, maybe we’ll get to ride away into the sunset bareback on a Unicorn once we have saved all sentient beings from the realms of Samsara.

Either way, in religious iconography, the animal kingdom taking a liking to us seems to be a good sign. It is said that St. Francis of Assisi used to preach to the birds and the sheep and all the animals of the field. But maybe, just maybe, they told him a thing or two, too.

For the Buddhists reading this article, of course you’ll think of the famous Koan—“Does a dog have Buddha nature?”

So much has been made of that one Koan that an entire book could be written about it. Some say the original answer was, no (or Mu) and that only humans could be so lucky as to have Buddha nature, while others argue that yes, due to the nature of interdependent co-arising, a dog does in fact have Buddha nature.

Of course, most argue that the dog would need to be reborn in human form so that it could first realize the noble truth of suffering and the origins of suffering and then through this realization desire to achieve Nirvana. Hence the dog, reborn in human form, would embark upon the long arduous journey of the ascetic. As a human, the lucky (former) dog could fast for 40 days and 40 nights, engage in hours of meditation and prayer, gain access to sacred scriptures and so forth.

This is typically the story that we are told about the hoops that we must jump through to cultivate superhuman, god-like compassion and fully harness the power of the Buddha nature and attain enlightenment.

And alas, monks and nuns and holy men and lay seekers embark upon this journey to become something other than crappy humans, all the while assuming that the animal kingdom has less value. We go to the zoo flaunting our smart phones and our opposable thumbs and the lions sleep, the tigers roar, the giraffes crane their necks, the snakes slither or sunbathe. And then, when we get to the chimpanzees—the animal with DNA most similar to our own—they fling their feces at us. There they are behind a cage, being gawked at by silly humans, and when they fling shit on us, we, the silly humans, are disgusted rather than delighted in their innate intelligence to call bullshit when they see it. (Or in this case, monkey shit.)

If I were being kept in a cage for the amusement of humans, I too would fling feces at the crappy, silly humans who came to gawk at me. And I would do it, just for shits and giggles (literally).

Then, the silly humans, having been so inspired by the animal kingdom in captivity, go out afterwards to feast on big juicy cheeseburgers. After dinner, the humans come home to their dogs who are happier than they could ever be to see us and we pat them on the head, speak to them in tongues not unlike the babble we reserve for newborns, pour them a bowl of kibble and let them take up half of our beds while we sleep.

I cannot say for certain that my dog has realized the nature of unborn awareness, though he does have a lot of time to contemplate such things. He certainly can’t recite the diamond sutra or the lord’s prayer. But what my dog does do is pretty darned holy if you ask me.

My dog greets all humans with the expectation that only good things are about to happen. Tail wagging, all goofy smiles, he wants you to pet him and he’s pretty darn sure that once you do, you’re going to love it as much as he does. He’ll kiss you until you’ve really had too many kisses but you can’t stop laughing so he keeps doing it. Oddly, if you are elderly or a child, he approaches you gently, as if he understands a different and more gentle behavior is required—but always, his tail (and with it his entire body) is wiggling with joy.

Some might say he’s empathic and feeding off of the emotions he is met with. But I’ve seen him meet some not so receptive people and his reaction to them is just the same. Pure joy. And when I’m not feeling well, my dog seems to understand, and he’ll put his paw on me as if to comfort me. And yes, he even gives me kisses when I’m crying.

Scientists seem to have proven that elephants display empathy—a phenomena that they describe as an “emotional contagion.”

Koko the gorilla learned how to communicate through sign language. Upon meeting Robin Williams in 2012, she asked him to tickle her and then she picked his pocket. (Perhaps she intuited that he needed a good laugh for a change.)

And then there is the story about the seemingly compassionate, altruistic dog who travels each night to feed other, less fortunate dogs:

Or the compassionate, altruistic and heroic dog who saved another dog after it was hit by a car, dragging it to safety:

These are selfless acts that indicate a level of empathy and intelligence that we seem to all too often discard as miraculous anomalies caught on tape. But if an animal falls in the woods and another animal is there to nurse its wounds, but no one catches it on video, does it still happen?

While researching this article, I found this:

What if the random acts of kindness or “morality” that occur in the animal kingdom are not the exception, but the norm?

We assume that because these animals do not have an advanced vocabulary with which they can pontificate the meaning of life, the universe and everything, that they are second class citizens in our human world. And while we have domesticated some and studied many, the majority of us could stand to look to the animal kingdom for where humankind can improve. (For example isn’t it amazing that both monkeys and dogs seem to have grasped the concept of equal pay for equal work—a concept that most human employers still struggle with?)

I once read about a study that shows that something as simple as tapping your fingers to the same rhythm as a stranger increases compassionate behavior, which reminds me of the scientist who studied the yawn contagion in the video and also of the elephant’s “emotional contagion.”

These acts of animal kindness and heroic altruism are performed independent of indoctrinated religious rhetoric. They are acts of kindness that are simply just done. I believe that even as crappy, silly humans, we can continue to perform acts of kindness too. After all, if a monkey can do it…

At a time when I am saddened by the death of Robin Williams, and worried about the state of the world from Missouri to Gaza, displays of animal compassion in action have somewhat ironically restored my faith in mankind.

So, my fellow travelers on the path who seek to exemplify and embody all that is good and right with the world, it would seem that empathy and compassion are innate qualities in mammals as much as they are innate qualities in humans. And the animals don’t seem to have to try so hard. It’s just a reminder—or maybe for some a realization—that I hope enlightens your practice and helps to lift your hearts.

It’s nice to know that while we might have the urge to fling our proverbial feces at someone when they cut us off driving, we are only one “emotional contagion” away from becoming aware that they need to change lanes, and offering them the space in the first place.

It’s nice to know that if a dog is capable of risking its life for another dog or a human, that we certainly must be.

Here is Paul Ekman. Professor Emeritus of Psychology, University of California, San Francisco on humans and heroic compassion:

The Bodhisattva of Compassion incarnate, HH Dalai Lama has said that because we are born so reliant on another human being for our survival (namely our mothers who are their to nurse us), the seeds of compassion are inherently within us.

He has spoken at length about the importance of watering the seeds of compassion in our children, but also to nurture the seeds of compassion in our own hearts and minds, and that if we do so, we will live and die happy and bonus: the world will be less a few million crappy, silly humans. It might even be heaven on earth.

A place where the lion lays down with the lamb, peace reigns supreme, a man is never so lonely in his suffering that he takes his own life, and the monkeys get paid equal pay for equal work.

 ~Sage Jessica Murphy

Originally published at Elephantjournal.com

Edited by Emily Barton

The Weight Loss Hack You’ll Want To Lie Down For

As the owner of a spa I answer a lot of client questions about massage. “Should massage hurt?” “ What should I wear during a massage?” “ What is the difference between deep tissue and Swedish massage?” “ What is a sports massage?” “Can I drink alcohol after a massage?” And so on.

(By the way, the answer to that last one is that yes, you can, but no, you should not.)

But one day a prospective client called and asked a question no one had ever asked before.

“How many calories does a one-hour massage burn?”

I was flummoxed.

I cradled the phone between my shoulder and my ear (never do this, it’s so bad for your neck) and quickly googled the question.

Could time spent laying on a table being kneaded like a loaf of bread translate to burning the calories contained in one?

Scanning the google search results, I felt cautiously optimistic.

One result yielded an answer of 240. Incredible! That’s the equivalent of an hour long jog, or roughly, several spoonfuls of Nutella.

But further googling revealed other answers that seemed far more likely.

Massage only burns a few more calories than sleeping. Or about 67 calories per hour for a 160 pound person. Roughly, the number of calories in the bite-sized chocolate that hotels place on your pillow at turn down service. Or, to frame it a little more bleakly, about a quarter of the caramel latte you downed with breakfast.

So, no. You can’t work off the Pad Thai you had for lunch by lying around and getting your body rubbed on.

There is, however, a bright side.

Or maybe it’s more of a loophole.

Massage could be a life hack for weight loss.

A recent Harvard study found that “stress eating” isn’t just an excuse to stuff our faces when we stressed.

It’s actually a thing.

A thing caused by hormones. (I’m talking to you, ladies.)

What’s worse is that stress affects the types of foods that we want to eat. Fat and sugar laden foods dampen stress related responses. So yeah, that’s why that box of donuts at the office is even more irresistible when you’re having a level 10 stress day.

It’s good news then that massage is one of the best ways to alleviate stress.

Massage alters EEG activity and increases the parasympathetic nervous system, decreasing cortisol levels.

(That is a fancy of way of saying that when you get massages you’re going to feel less stressed because you’ll be less stressed.)

And unlike the theories that massage burns 240 calories, the positive effects that massage has on the body and its ability to lower stress hormones, is scientificly proven.

Massage every few weeks should do wonders for your stress levels.

And BONUS we’ve recently implemented a monthly membership program that makes your regular massages more affordable.

So the next time you're feeling stressed, and all you want is to go home and eat that pint of Gelato in your freezer, consider scheduling a massage instead.

Your body and your skinny jeans will thank you.

See you soon!

(Name of Spa Owner.)

*This nurture email was ghost written for an independently owned, high-end spa in Del Mar, California to generate an interest in booking regular massages through a newly implemented monthly membership program. Links to information about the program and to schedule an appointment online were embedded in the email.

Planning a trip to Haleakala? Read this first.

Haleakala is a Hawaiian word which, when roughly translated means, “house of the sun.”  That should be all you need to know right there, right? Well no, not exactly.

You’re going to get your climb on.

Along the 37 mile drive up to Haleakala summit, you will navigate over thirty switchbacks to complete the climb from sea level to 10,000 feet.  The amazing fact about such a steep climb (the quickest, most drastic in the world) is that you will encounter several “life” zones: alpine/Aeolian, subalpine/shrubland, rain forest, dry forest and a lowland/coastal zone.  In order to encounter these life zones during a drive on the mainland, you would have to trek from Mexico to Canada!

It’s going to be windy. Then cold. But it could be hot. And rainy. But also sunny too.

If you haven’t already figured out what traversing all of those ecosystems means for your wardrobe, it means lots of layers, and preparing for rain and shine.  The temperature can drop an average of 3 degrees per thousand feet that you climb towards the summit- so if it is 70 degrees on the main part of the island, it will be roughly 40 degrees on the summit of Haleakala. (The temperatures at the summit range between 20 and 40 degrees.)  Layering on the sweaters, hats and jackets and possibly bringing comforter from your hotel room or condo are all fine ideas. (Just don’t tell them I told you to.) The weather at Haleakala summit is unpredictable so go prepared for all scenarios; sun, cold, wind, rain and yes, even snow.  If you go to Haleakala without warm clothing, rain gear and sunscreen, you’re going to have a terrible time. There are few things more miserable than standing around in the freezing cold and wind waiting for something beautiful to happen – and as beautiful as the sunrise over Haleakala is, nothing is really that enjoyable if you are downright uncomfortable. 

Fuel up.

There are no pop up restaurants, Starbucks, or vending machines at Haleakala summit, so packing a lunch and snacks is a great idea, especially if there are children involved. But don’t expect to spread out the checkered blanket and paper plates at the summit. It’s so windy up there, it’s actually easier to eat in the car. Which reminds me, leave with a full tank of gas to avoid being stranded- there are no gas stations at Haleakala summit. Lastly, if you aren’t prepared to deal with traffic, potential parking issues and crowds of people that can number almost 1000, then try going at sunset, which is equally as stunning. 

Try not to lose your lunch.

Did I mention you should bring ginger, and probably dramamine? I’m not a doctor so I can’t prescribe medication, but if ever there was a trip that would induce car sickness, this is the one. As long as you can avoid hunger pangs and motion sickness, and are able to stay warm and hydrated – your experience at Haleakala summit should be nothing short of dreamy.   

The drive up is intense.

I know I mentioned this already, but the switchbacks up the volcano are no joke. You are going to turn left and then right and then left and then right again and then left and right again, until you just don’t want to do it anymore, all the while trying to take in the scenery and not smash into other cars. Mentally prepare.

Is it worth it?

Is waking up long before the crack of dawn and piling everyone in the car to drive over an hour up winding switchbacks in the dark just to watch the sunrise over a dormant volcano worth it?  Absofuckinglutely, but don’t take my word for it. Experience Haleakala for yourself.

*Blog written for a Maui travel related media company for the thirty-something traveller.

Visiting Maui? Definitely Check Out Lahaina Town

Once the capital of Hawaii, Lahaina is a town rich with the history of Maui’s transition into the 19th century.  Ever wonder why all of the resorts that claim to be located in Lahaina are actually five minutes away in Kaanapali? That’s why. Because back in the day, Lahaina was where it was it. (And by “it,” I mean everything.) If you’re thinking about staying in Lahaina during your visit to Maui there are a few things you should know:   

Lahaina was once Hawaii’s wildest port.  In the 1800’s whaling ships brought whalers to the boisterous town, which catered to the appetites of the sea faring men with brothels and booze.  The missionaries who lived on Maui at the time were appalled by the hedonism of the whalers, and by the willingness of the native Hawaiian women to entertain them. (It is said that the native Hawaiian women often swam out to meet the boats, and their inhabitant sailors, when they arrived in Lahaina’s port.)   This whaling/missionary era has been preserved through the efforts of the Lahaina Restoration Foundation whose headquarters are located on the corner of Front and Dickenson Streets. To visit more historical sights by foot, you can pick up a self-guided walking tour map, which include the Baldwin House, The Master’s Reading Room, Hale Pa’i Printing House, Wo Hing Chinese Temple, Hale Aloha Church and The Old Lahaina Courthouse.  You can even visit the Lahaina jail, (The Hale Pa’ahao Prison) which was built by the missionaries to show the whalers that they were serious about putting a stop to all of the drunken revelry.   

         These days Lahaina isn’t as much about debauchery and blubber as it is about shopping and dining out but it is certainly still holds the title for most bustling town on the island. Lahaina is almost always flooded with tourists who can be found, any time of year, any time of day, strolling along Front Street toting shopping bags and ice cream cones.  Front Street is Lahaina’s main street and it is chock full of T-shirt shops, surf shops, galleries, boutiques and restaurants. Introverts, beware- Lahaina is not the place to stay on Maui if you aren’t in the mood to deal with crowds- especially crowds of tourists. (The population of Lahaina swells to 30,000 or more during high tourist seasons.) If on the other hand, you enjoy people watching, shopping, eating, and hustling and bustling, Lahaina might be your cup of tea.  Lahaina is also where you will board boats bound for those ever popular whale watching and fishing expeditions, and it is at the Lahaina ports where you will catch your ferries to Oahu and Lanai’i if you are traveling to those islands.  

Lahaina’s popularity as a tourist attraction and seaport makes parking difficult, but it really is a little gem of a town and it is well worth braving the crowds for a day visit.  Why just a day? The big resorts at Kaanapali are about a five-minute drive from Lahaina and while Lahaina is home to a few quaint B&B’s, most of the places to stay on Maui are elsewhere, as are the best beaches, slightly cooler temperatures and the quintessential laid back Maui atmosphere.

~Sage Jessica Murphy

The Plaza Hotel New York City

Features: The New York Plaza is a legendary NY hotel and historical landmark. The ornately adorned Plaza Hotel NYC boasts the most prestigious location in NYC at Central Park South and Fifth Avenue, and a 100-year history that includes a guest roster that ranges from Eleanor Roosevelt to Mark Twain to The Beatles.

Why We Stay: The New York Plaza opened its doors on October 1, 1907 to a flurry of reports that it was the finest hotel in the world.  At 19 stories, it was once considered a NYC skyscraper. Today it is still as grand as ever, boasting 282 guest rooms including 102 luxury suites. Its history, glamour, ornate rococo decor and equisite service make the Plaza NY one of the finest and most famous NYC hotels.

• The New Plaza: The Plaza Hotel New York has undergone a $450 million, three year long renovation that retains its unforgettable charm and decor while incorporating modern ammenities for the discerning traveller. The Plaza Hotel earned a AAA Five Diamond Rating in 2010, officially acknowledging it as one of the world's most distinguished hotels.

• Central Park and Fifth Ave: When you stay at The Plaza Hotel NYC, not only do you become part of its ongoing history, you are staying in a beautifully appointed hotel at Central Park South and Fifth Ave. As far as most New Yorkers are concerned, The Plaza Hotel New York at Central Park and Fifth Avenue is one of the best locations for a NYC hotel. Period.

Inside Knowledge: The New York Plaza is so well known that Ernest Hemingway once advised F. Scott Fitzgerald to give his liver to Princeton and his heart to the Plaza NY.

Do's and Don'ts:

• Do Take The Phantom: When you stay at the Plaza Hotel, there is a Rolls Royce Phantom at your service. At the Plaza Hotel Hotel, a concierge will help you get where you need to go in NYC style - in a Rolls Royce Phantom.

• Do Visit the Oak Room: The Oak Room is a famous NY restaurant located at the New York Plaza. The Oak Room New York caters to New York City's upscale crowd, and serves brunch, lunch and dinner in an ornate dining room carved out of oak.

• Don't Walk Everywhere: When you stay at the Plaza Hotel NYC, you will be within prime walking distance to Central Park and the shops on Fifth Ave, which are right outside your door, but you will also be in a premiere location to hail a handsome cab. Between Fifth and Sixth Ave, the old tradition of a horse drawn carriage ride through Central Park lives on. There are thousands of cabs in NYC, but few are as handsome as these. Ask your Plaza concierge for details.

• Don't Expect a Bargain: When you stay at the Plaza NY, you are paying to have the experience of staying at one of the world's most famous historical hotels. You are also paying for butler service, spacious hotel rooms, and rides in a Rolls Royce Phantom. Remember, The Plaza Hotel NY is where the star of Sex and the City, Sarah Jessica Parker, had her real life wedding. You go to the Plaza to spend money, not to save it.

~Sage Jessica Murphy

The Empire Hotel New York City

Features: The Empire New York is a famous NYC boutique hotel occupying a prized plot of New York City real estate. The Empire Hotel overlooks Lincoln Plaza NYC and offers views of upper Manhattan, the Hudson River and Central Park. Its premiere location in Manhattan has made the Empire NYC a favorite amongst fashionistas, celebrities, and the "who's who" in New York City.

Why We Stay: The Empire New York has been providing luxury accommodations in New York City for over 100 years. The Empire Hotel NY affords some of New York City's finest views in a premiere location on the Upper West Side.

• Location: The Hotel Empire NYC is a stone's throw from such amazing NY attractions like beautiful Central Park, the Empire State Building, the Museum of Modern Art NYC, and Lincoln Center, which was most recently made famous by the popularity of NYC Fashion Week.

• Hollywood Glamour: Located at the gateway to New York City's Upper West Side, the Empire New York prides itself on its attractive and posh decor. The Hotel Empire boasts a trendsetting, glamorous style that makes it a favorite haunt amongst famous actors, models and writers.

Inside Knowledge: The Hotel Empire NYC is home to one of the few rooftop pools in Manhattan, and is open seasonally May through September. 

Do's and Don'ts:

• Do Eat at Ed's: Ed's Chowder House at the Empire Hotel New York was designed to make you feel like you just stepped off the streets of New York and onto the Atlantic coast. Ed's Chowder House offers traditional East Coast seafood fare including tuna steak frites, lobster rolls and crab cakes, all from the convenience of the Empire NYC.

• Do Enjoy the Pool: Rooftop pools in New York are rare, and usually only accessible to Manhattan's elite. Enjoy a poolside cocktail from the top of the Empire NYC in the shadow of some of New York's most beaufitul buildings.

• Don't Expect a Big Room: In New York, size does matter. When you book a standard room at the Empire Hotel New York, expect to skimp a little bit on size. This is New York City, and the Empire Hotel on the Upper West Side is an ultra chic hotel in a premiere location. If you want one of those big hotel suites in NYC, you are going to have to pay a handsome sum for it.

• Don't Miss the Spa: Jeunesse Spa at the Empire Hotel NY is a relaxing enclave where you can enjoy a manicure and pedicure or a therapeutic massage in NYC.

~Sage Jessica Murphy